The Best Ever Book of Programmer Jokes

Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who

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Author: Mark Geoffrey Young

Publisher: CreateSpace

ISBN: 9781468078909

Category: Humor

Page: 106

View: 4889

If you've ever heard a Jewish, Blond, Italian, Irish, Blond, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Australian, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Programmer jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Programmer Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The book of programmer jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one programmer joke in this book, there's something wrong with you.This book has so many programmer jokes, you won't know where to start. For example:Why do programmers wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace.***A programmer and his wife were sitting around the breakfast table one lazy Sunday morning. The Programmer turned to his wife and said: “When I die, I want you to sell all my stuff.”“Why would you want me to do that?,” asked his wife.“I figure that you'll eventually remarry, and I don't want some asshole using my stuff,” replied the programmer.The programmer's spouse said: “What makes you think I'd marry another asshole?”***Did you hear about the programmer who wore two jackets when he painted his house?The instructions on the can said: “Put on two coats.”***Why do programmers laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it.

The Best Ever Book of Computer Programmer Jokes

Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who

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Author: Mark Geoffrey Young

Publisher: CreateSpace

ISBN: 9781477599051

Category: Humor

Page: 106

View: 3318

The Best Ever Book of Computer Programmer Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who If you've ever heard a Jewish, Italian, Irish, Libyan, Catholic, Mexican, Polish, Norwegian, or an Essex Girl, Newfie, Mother-in-Law, or joke aimed at a minority, this book of Computer Programmer jokes is for you. In this not-so-original book, The Best Ever Book of Computer Programmer Jokes; Lots and Lots of Jokes Specially Repurposed for You-Know-Who, Mark Young takes a whole lot of tired, worn out jokes and makes them funny again. The Best Ever Book of Computer Programmer Jokes is so unoriginal, it's original. And, if you don't burst out laughing from at least one Computer Programmer joke in this book, there's something wrong with you. This book has so many Computer Programmer jokes, you won't know where to start. For example: Why do Computer Programmers wear slip-on shoes? You need an IQ of at least 4 to tie a shoelace. *** An evil genie captured a Computer Programmer and her two friends and banished them to the desert for a week. The genie allowed each person to bring one thing. The first friend brought a canteen so he wouldn't die of thirst. The second friend brought an umbrella to keep the sun off. The Computer Programmer brought a car door, because if it got too hot she could just roll down the window! *** Did you hear about the Computer Programmer who wore two jackets when she painted the house? The instructions on the can said: "Put on two coats." *** Why do Computer Programmers laugh three times when they hear a joke? Once when it is told, once when it is explained to them, and once when they understand it. ***

The Biggest Joke Book Ever

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Author: Jack Jacoby

Publisher: Trafford Publishing

ISBN: 1425145418

Category:

Page: 688

View: 4058

An amazing collection of thousands of jokes - great for any occasions or just to get a great belly-laugh.

The Everything Big Book of Jokes

Hundreds of the Shortest, Longest, Silliest, Smartest, Most Hilarious Jokes You've Never Heard!

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Author: Evan C Thomas

Publisher: Simon and Schuster

ISBN: 1440576971

Category: Humor

Page: 272

View: 3084

Presents a collection of miscellaneous jokes, divided into such categories as marriage, politics, sports, health, animals, and everyday life.

Hilarious Jokes

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Author: Ed. G. C. Goel

Publisher: Diamond Pocket Books (P) Ltd.

ISBN: 9788171821037

Category:

Page: 168

View: 778

Microsloth Joke Book

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Author: David Pogue

Publisher: Berkley Publishing Group

ISBN: 9780425160541

Category: Humor

Page: 154

View: 8439

Collects humor about the Microsoft Corporation, its founder and staff, and its products, including "Microsoft announces" press releases, light bulb jokes, top ten lists, and other jokes

Fundamentals of Complementary and Alternative Medicine - E-Book

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Author: Marc S. Micozzi

Publisher: Elsevier Health Sciences

ISBN: 1437727050

Category: Medical

Page: 624

View: 2678

Focusing on emerging therapies and those best supported by clinical trials and scientific evidence, Fundamentals of Complementary and Alternative Medicine describes some of the most prevalent and the fastest-growing CAM therapies in use today. Prominent author Dr. Marc Micozzi provides a complete overview of CAM, creating a solid foundation and context for therapies in current practice. Coverage of systems and therapies includes mind, body, and spirit; traditional Western healing; and traditional ethnomedical systems from around the world. Discussions include homeopathy, massage and manual therapies, chiropractic, a revised chapter on osteopathy, herbal medicine, aromatherapy, naturopathic medicine, and nutrition and hydration. With its wide range of topics, this is the ideal CAM reference for both students and practitioners! An evidence-based approach focuses on treatments best supported by clinical trials and scientific evidence. Coverage of CAM therapies and systems includes those most commonly encountered or growing in popularity, so you carefully evaluate each treatment. Global coverage includes discussions of traditional healing arts from Europe, Asia, Africa, and the Americas. Longevity in the market makes this a classic, trusted text. Expert contributors include well-known writers such as Kevin Ergil, Patch Adams, Joseph Pizzorno, Victor Sierpina, and Marc Micozzi himself. Suggested readings and references in each chapter list the best resources for further research and study. New, expanded organization covers the foundations of CAM, traditional Western healing, and traditional ethnomedical systems from Asia, Africa, and the Americas, putting CAM in perspective and making it easier to understand CAM origins and contexts. NEW content includes legal and operational issues in integrative medicine, creative and expressive arts therapies, ecological pharmacology, hydration, mind-body thought and practice in America, osteopathy, reflexology, South American healing, traditional medicines of India, and Unani medicine. Revised and updated chapters include aromatherapy, classical acupuncture, energy medicine, biophysical devices (electricity, light, and magnetism), massage and touch therapies, traditional osteopathy, reflexology, vitalism, and yoga. New research studies explain how and why CAM therapies work, and also demonstrate that they do work, in areas such as acupuncture, energy healing, and mind-body therapies. Expanded content on basic sciences includes biophysics, ecology, ethnomedicine, neurobiology, and pschoneuroimmunology, providing the scientific background needed to learn and practice CAM and integrative medicine. Expanded coverage of nutrition and hydration includes practical information on Vitamin D and healthy hydration with fluid and electrolytes.

Dick v Dom - The Joke Battle

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Author: Dominic Wood,Richard McCourt

Publisher: Macmillan Children's Books

ISBN: 1760780944

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: 192

View: 6384

The time has come to find the funniest joke ever! And Dick and Dom, esteemed TV geniuses and authors of the bestselling Dick and Dom's Big Fat and Very Silly Joke Book, are the right people for the job. In Dick v Dom - The Joke Battle they battle to find the very best joke ever through a series of hilarious themed rounds. Want to hear the best cheese joke ever? Dick thinks he knows it, but then again so does Dom, so it's up to you to decide. Let battle commence – and may the best joker win!