Everything Is Perfect When You're a Liar

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Everything Is Perfect When You're a Liar

Everything Is Perfect When You're a Liar

  • Author: Kelly Oxford
  • Publisher: Harper Collins
  • ISBN: 0062102249
  • Category: Biography & Autobiography
  • Page: 336
  • View: 9650
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Kelly Oxford is . . . A wunderkind producer of pirated stage productions for six-year-olds Not the queen of the world An underage schnitzel-house dishwasher The kid who stood up to a bully and almost passed out from the resulting adrenaline rush A born salesman Capable of willing her eyesight to be 20/20 That girl who peed her pants in the gas station that one time Totally an expert on strep throat Incapable of making Leonardo DiCaprio her boyfriend A writer A certified therapy assistant who heals with Metallica mixtapes "Not fat enough to be super snuggly." —Bea, age four Not above using raspberry-studded sh*t to get out of a speeding ticket "Bitingly funny. But everybody knows that." —Roger Ebert Sad that David Copperfield doesn't own a falcon A terrible liar

When You Find Out the World Is Against You

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When You Find Out the World Is Against You

When You Find Out the World Is Against You

And Other Funny Memories About Awful Moments

  • Author: Kelly Oxford
  • Publisher: HarperCollins
  • ISBN: 0062322796
  • Category: Biography & Autobiography
  • Page: 320
  • View: 3693
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The author of the New York Times bestseller Everything Is Perfect When You’re a Liar returns with a deeper and even funnier new collection of essays about the pleasures and perils of living in Kelly Oxford’s head. Kelly Oxford likes to blow up the internet. Whether it is with the kind of Tweets that lead Rolling Stone to name her one of the Funniest People on Twitter or with pictures of her hilariously adorable family (human and animal) or with something much more serious, like creating the hashtag #NotOkay, where millions of women came together to share their stories of sexual assault, Kelly has a unique, razor-sharp perspective on modern life. As a screen writer, professional sh*t disturber, wife and mother of three, Kelly is about everything but the status quo. Perfect for anyone who ever wished David Sedaris and Mindy Kaling would just finally write a book together already, When You Find Out the World is Against You is filled with the biting, wise, and laugh-out-loud insights that have won Kelly legions of fans. Whether she’s detailing her obsession as an eleven-year-old with going to camp so she can become a “kissing bandit,” exploring the bittersweet boredom that so often accompanies parenthood, calling out the insanity of a posse of internet poodle vigilantes, writing bracingly about the anxiety that has plagued her as long as she can remember or taking us to ride shotgun as she stalks her husband on an accidental date with another man, When You Find Out the World Is Against You is Kelly at her most honest and disarmingly funny best. Her comedic skill, down-to-earth voice, and bull’s-eye observations on the absurdity of modern life mean there is nothing quite like seeing the world through Kelly’s eyes.

Lessons For A Sunday Father

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Lessons For A Sunday Father

Lessons For A Sunday Father

  • Author: Claire Calman
  • Publisher: Random House
  • ISBN: 1448126606
  • Category: Fiction
  • Page: 448
  • View: 5124
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IT'S NEVER TOO LATE TO GROW UP... This is the story of SCOTT, who finds his belongings outside in a bin bag one day and realises he may have made a Big Mistake GAIL, who wishes her husband were under guarantee so she could send him back and get a refund NAT, who discovers that growing up isn't all it's cracked up to be ROSIE, who just wants her Dad back - or if not, then at least some new glitter nail polish. Four lives, one story: love, loss and learning to be a grown-up.

The Walk-In Closet

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The Walk-In Closet

The Walk-In Closet

  • Author: Abdi Nazemian
  • Publisher: N.A
  • ISBN: 9780615988689
  • Category: Closeted gays
  • Page: 274
  • View: 5398
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2015 Lambda Literary Award Nominee, Best LGBT Debut 2015 Lambda Literary Award Nominee, Best LGBT Debut Winner in the "Gay and Lesbian Fiction" category of the 2014 International Book Awards Finalist in the Best Multicultural Fiction Category at the 2014 Next Generation Indie Book Awards "Absorbing entertainment. I walked into Nazemian's walk-in closet and didn't want to walk out." Kelly Oxford, author of Everything is Perfect When You're a Liar "Absolutely engrossing read from page one- Abdi Nazemian has painted a world so vivid and real that even if you know nothing of 'Tehrangeles', by the end you feel as if you are a part it. I simply COULD NOT put this book down! " Busy Philipps "At once wickedly funny and devastatingly moving, The Walk-In Closet is a thrilling ride from start to finish. Nazemian surprises with every turn he takes, telling a story that vividly illustrates the price of living in a closet." Chaz Bono, author of Family Outing, The End of Innocence and Transition "I relished every moment of this warm, funny, brutally engaging novel. Abdi Nazemian's Los Angeles is both uncannily familiar and entirely foreign. Put this in the canon of LA literature: Nazemian has written a side of Los Angeles prevalent in real life but rarely seen in fiction." Katherine Taylor, author of Rules for Saying Goodbye "Ladies: If you like Shahs of Sunset you'll love The Walk-In Closet. Abdi Nazemian shines a white hot, entertaining spotlight on the ins and outs of Tehrangeles. Abdi will get your inner Persian princess purring. Curl up and enjoy this fabulous debut!" -- Jessica Bendinger, author of The Seven Rays, screenwriter of Bring it On and Sex and the City "The Walk-In Closet is a contemporary fable of love, loss and redemption, set between cultures and between the sexes. Written at a spanking pace, with humor, suspense and a heart, it captures the voice of a generation and paves the way to a new genre of literary fiction." Lila Azam Zanganeh, author of The Enchanter: Nabokov and Happiness Kara Walker has never found much glamour in her own life, especially not when compared to the life of her best friend Bobby Ebadi. Bobby, along with his sophisticated parents Leila and Hossein, is everything Kara always wanted to be. The trio provides the perfect antidote to what Kara views as the more mundane problems of her girlfriends and her divorced parents. And so when the Ebadis assume that Kara is Bobby's girlfriend, she willingly steps into the role. She enjoys the perks of life in this closet, not only Leila's designer hand-me-downs and free rent, but also the excitement of living life as an Ebadi. As Kara's 30th birthday approaches, Leila and Hossein up the pressure. They are ready for Kara to assume the mantle of the next Mrs. Ebadi, and Bobby seems prepared to give them what they want: the illusion of a traditional home and grandchildren. How far will Kara be willing to go? And will she be willing to pull the Persian rug out from under them when she discovers that her own secret is just one of many lurking inside the Ebadi closet?

The Devil Is a Liar, Are You?

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The Devil Is a Liar, Are You?

The Devil Is a Liar, Are You?

  • Author: J. D.
  • Publisher: AuthorHouse
  • ISBN: 147725448X
  • Category: Religion
  • Page: 120
  • View: 5047
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This book about a powerful conversation I had with God where he reveals things to me. I am given an assignment to deliver my message which I have written about in this book. My mission is to deliver the message Jesus would like to reveal for us all.

Grumpy Old Holidays

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Grumpy Old Holidays

Grumpy Old Holidays

The Official Handbook

  • Author: Judith Holder
  • Publisher: Hachette UK
  • ISBN: 1780223870
  • Category: Humor
  • Page: 208
  • View: 7914
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Welcome on board - holidays the Grumpy way! As every Grumpy Old Man and Woman knows, holidays are another way of keeping you all house-trained. They are civilised society's reminder to you that the tedium of everyday life is actually preferable to a fortnight spent in the company of nagging partners, other people's brats, bombastic in-laws; and - worse still - people who can't speak English. As soon as you check in at the airport you are marooned in a sea of screaming babies, dull-faced reps and bland airport food. Count yourself lucky if your optimistic expectation of a good holiday is even remotely fulfilled. Don't be fooled by the glamorous air-brushed photos of American models with tippexed teeth sitting by laguna pools, cocktail in hand. There may be beautiful sunsets by the beach in the brochure, but you'll inevitably find that a) you should have booked the neighbouring hotel (and if you're lucky she'll tell you so, 'ad nauseam') b) you picked the rainy/religious holiday/mosquito/plague infestation season - and wonder why it was so cheap and c) you'll have had too much sex or food by the third or fourth day and be bored of each other, but there's no-one else to talk to, apart from monosyllabic waiting staff and the ubiquitous Russians. A holiday is supposed to be a lovely break, isn't it? This book proves that it is the stay-at-homes who have all the fun.

The Perfect Monologue

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The Perfect Monologue

The Perfect Monologue

How to Find and Perform the Monologue That Will Get You the Part

  • Author: Ginger Howard Friedman
  • Publisher: Hal Leonard Corporation
  • ISBN: 0879106204
  • Category: Performing Arts
  • Page: 376
  • View: 1417
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(Limelight). In this companion volume to her highly successful Callback , Ginger Howard Friedman, a veteran casting director, playwright and teacher, reveals her winning formula for a monologue audition that lands you the part. She explains her essential rules for a successful audition, then selects scenes from 16 plays and adapts them into monologues, comic and serious, for men and women of all ages.

Russian Comedy of the Nikolaian Rea

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Russian Comedy of the Nikolaian Rea

Russian Comedy of the Nikolaian Rea

  • Author: Laurence Senelick
  • Publisher: Routledge
  • ISBN: 1135299625
  • Category: Performing Arts
  • Page: 112
  • View: 1112
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These four Russian comedies were written during the reign of Nicholas I, a period of considerable repression and censorship. They represent the most popular genres of the period. Lensky's Her First Night was an immensely popular vaudeville which held the stage for years; Kozma Prutkov's Fantasy is a parody of vaudeville which was banned after one night. Turgenev's Luncheon with the Marshal is a comedy of manners about provincial life, and Saltykov-Schedrin's Pazukhin's Death is a satire of greed and corruption so savage that it was forbidden during the author's lifetime. This collection constitutes a remarkable comic spectrum which will assist in enlarging the English language repertoire with a set of newly available and hightly stageworthy scripts.

Why I Use a King James Bible

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Why I Use a King James Bible

Why I Use a King James Bible

  • Author: Creation Liberty Evangelism,Christopher J.E. Johnson
  • Publisher: Creation Liberty Evangelism
  • ISBN: N.A
  • Category: Education
  • Page: N.A
  • View: 3324
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How did we end up with so many English versions of the Bible, and why is the King James superior?

The Vampire Chronicles Collection

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The Vampire Chronicles Collection

The Vampire Chronicles Collection

Interview with the Vampire, The Vampire Lestat, The Queen of the Damned

  • Author: Anne Rice
  • Publisher: Ballantine Books
  • ISBN: 0307762548
  • Category: Fiction
  • Page: 1280
  • View: 1921
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The hypnotic, deeply seductive novels of Anne Rice have captivated millions of fans around the world. It all began a quarter of a century ago with Interview with the Vampire. Now, in one chilling volume, here are the first three classic novels of The Vampire Chronicles. INTERVIEW WITH THE VAMPIRE Witness the confessions of a vampire. A novel of mesmerizing beauty and astonishing force, it is a story of danger and flight, love and loss, suspense and resolution, and the extraordinary power of the senses. “A magnificent, compulsively readable thriller . . . Anne Rice begins where Bram Stoker and the Hollywood versions leave off and penetrates directly to the true fascination of the myth–the education of the vampire.” –Chicago Tribune THE VAMPIRE LESTAT Once an aristocrat from pre-revolutionary France, now a rock star in the decadent 1980s, Lestat rushes through the centuries seeking to fathom the mystery of his existence. His is a mesmerizing story–passionate and thrilling. “Frightening, sensual . . . A psychological, mythological sojourn . . . Anne Rice will live on through the ages of literature. . . . To read her is to become giddy as if spinning through the mind of time.” –San Francisco Chronicle QUEEN OF THE DAMNED Akasha, the queen of the damned, has risen from a six-thousand-year sleep to let loose the powers of the night. She has a marvelously devious plan to “save” mankind–in this vivid novel of the erotic, electrifying world of the undead. “With The Queen of the Damned, Anne Rice has created universes within universes, traveling back in time as far as ancient, pre-pyramidic Egypt and journeying from the frozen mountain peaks of Nepal to the crowded, sweating streets of southern Florida.” –Los Angeles Times