Search results for: dear-dumb-diary-12-me-just-like-you-only-better

Me Just Like You Only Better

Author : Jim Benton
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There are more than 5 million Dear Dumb Diary books in print!Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don't tell her.Dear Dumb Diary, I went five whole days without seeing or hearing from Angeline. I was beginning to get used to it. It's true that I have learned to overlook many of Angeline's flaws, like her flawlessness, but she can still be difficult to be around. Like when she's lit perfectly, for example. To my extreme credit, I have learned to pretend to ignore Angeline's failure to not be perfect.

Live Each Day to the Dumbest

Author : Jim Benton
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The hilarious and bestselling series from Jim Benton continues! It's not easy being a middle-schooler, and nobody knows that better than Jamie Kelly. There are surprises around every corner: some good, some bad, all dumb. But when Jamie inherits a trunk of her grandmother's things, she never expects to find the biggest surprise of all -- Grandma's diary. Violating the privacy of a diary is something Jamie would never do . . . unless she was absolutely certain that she wanted to do it. And when she does, she learns that, deep down, everyone is exactly the same. Dumb. Jamie still has no idea that anyone is reading her diary, so please, please, please don't tell her. And definitely don't tell her that she's the star of her very own Dear Dumb Diary movie, available on DVD. (Her glamorous ego might not be able to handle it.)

Dumbness Is a Dish Best Served Cold

Author : Jim Benton
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Jamie Kelly is back and dumber than ever in this super-awesome four-color Dear Dumb Diary special edition! Life at Mackerel Middle School is as dumb as ever—but Jamie Kelly may have finally found the key to fame, fortune, and fabulousness. Together with Isabella and Angeline, she's come up with a moneymaking idea, and it has to do with food. Everyone likes food! They're going to be rich! The only problem? They have to come up with something that people actually want to eat. Jamie has some sophisticated thoughts on food, like, "She was manipulating us like dough. Like the sweet, delicious dough that we are. And she was baking us into the type of delicious cookies you can only get from dough like us. And she was putting sprinkles of us on top of us, and—forget it. I'm hungry. I want some cookies." This is sure to go well.

Dear Dumb Diary Year Two 5 You Can Bet on That

Author : Jim Benton
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The hilarious and bestselling series from Jim Benton continues! Jamie, Isabella, and Angeline have known each other for a long time. They've even become friends -- whether Jamie likes it or not. But when the trio starts a friendly competition, all bets are off. The loser will be treated to a game of Dare or Worse Dare... with Isabella. (And Jamie's pretty sure that's like having a banana-peeling contest with a starving monkey. The monkey always wins.) What could go wrong? Probably everything. And it's probably all that blondwad Angeline's fault. Probably. Jamie still has no idea that anyone is reading her diary, so please, please, please don't tell her. And definitely don't tell her that she's the star of her very own Dear Dumb Diary movie, available on DVD. (Her glamorous ego might not be able to handle it.) ----------- EXCERPT: Dear Dumb Diary, Isabella and I had one of those days where you spend four hours trying to come up with something to do, and then by the time you do, there’s no time to do it so you just watch TV in positions that make it look like maybe you were born without bones. We do this about twelve times a month. "Since we're not doing anything, we should practice debate," I said. "No, we shouldn't," Isabella said. "We just did," I said.

Dear Dumb Diary Year Two 3 Nobody s Perfect I m As Close As It Gets

Author : Jim Benton
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Whatever you do, DON'T read Jamie Kelly's bestselling diaries! The bestselling Dear Dumb Diary series is a hilarious hit! Now Jamie Kelly's diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. Dear Dumb Diary Year Two is still laugh-out-loud funny -- but everything is another year dumber! As Jamie continues to grapple with middle school's Big Questions, she drops even more snarky gems of wisdom like, "Everybody knows that the more you love somebody, the less you try to look nice for them," and "People don't appreciate how much willpower it takes to do the wrong thing." (But Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don't tell her.)

Dear Dumb Diary 5 Can Adults Become Human

Author : Jim Benton
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Read the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true...or at least as true as it needs to be. Dear Dumb Diary, My social studies teacher, Mr. VanDoy, never smiles. I know that's hard to believe, because everybody smiles about something, right? Isabella smiles when her brothers get in trouble. Angeline smiles when she thinks about how much prettier she is than, like, a waterfall or a unicorn. I smile when I think about a unicorn kicking Angeline over a waterfall. But Mr. VanDoy doesn't smile at all. I wonder if when you become an adult, you can lose your sense of humor the way you lose your teeth or hair or fashion sense.

Dear Dumb Diary 7 Never Underestimate Your Dumbness

Author : Jim Benton
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Sneak a peek inside the NY Times bestselling diary of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything she writes is true -- or at least as true as it needs to be. Dear Dumb Diary, Isabella is probably right. She almost always is. When I think back on all the things I've seen Angeline do, the one thing they have in common is that they're all dumb. (They're all strawberry-scented, too, but I think that's just her conditioner -- although her body might actually secrete its own strawberry scent.) But of all the dumb things she's ever done, this has got to be the dumbest. . . .

School Hasn t This Gone on Long Enough Dear Dumb Diary Year Two 1

Author : Jim Benton
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Bestselling author Jim Benton is back, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series! Bestselling author Jim Benton is back, with a brand-new spin on a favorite series!Dear Dumb Diary is a hilarious hit! Now after 12 books (each covering a month of her life), Jamie Kelly's upcoming diaries have a fresh look and a fun twist. It's Dear Dumb Diary: Year Two! The diary entries are still laugh-out-loud funny -- but this is a whole new beginning. Everything is another year dumber!As Jamie grapples with school, grades, and middle school's Big Questions, don't miss even more of her words of wisdom like, "If someone is really, really intelligent, it would be polite if they would ugly it up a bit before they left the house."(Jamie STILL has no idea that anybody is reading her diary. So please, please, please don't tell her.)

Dear Dumb Diary 9 That s What Friends Aren t For

Author : Jim Benton
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Bestselling author Jamie Kelly is back with an all-new, all-funny diary! But she has no idea that anybody is reading it. So please, please, please don't tell her. Dear Dumb Diary, So now I'm friends with Angeline. This is automatic friendship, and I have to just accept it and make the best of things. See, if I objected, then Aunt Carol might divorce Angeline's uncle, sending both of them tumbling into a deep pit of depression for the rest of their lives, and Angeline could wind up feeling so guilty that she would have to go be locked up in an old dirty insane asylum for years and years, and Stinker's puppies could grow up not knowing both their parents --- and I couldn't live with myself for doing something like that to a puppy.

Dear Dumb Diary 2 My Pants Are Haunted

Author : Jim Benton
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Read the hilarious, candid (and sometimes not-so-nice), diaries of Jamie Kelly, who promises that everything in her diary is true -- or at least as true as it needs to be. They were just a soft, ordinary pair of thrift-shop jeans until Jamie Kelly tried them on . . . Then they became a tight, scratchy, slightly smelly, and utterly ordinary pair of thrift-shop jeans with an embarrassing haunting problem. Do the pants have the power to soothe a vengeful beagle, vanquish The Prettiest Girl in the World, or make the wearer irresistible to the eighth cutest guy in the grade? Are the haunted pants so dazzling they can hurt and maybe permanently damage the eyes of onlookers? Or are the haunted pants just, well, haunted (which is kind of gross when you think about it)?