Match! Joke Book

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Author: Macmillan Children's Books

Publisher: Pan Macmillan

ISBN: 1509825010

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: N.A

View: 6766

Over four hundred of the funniest football jokes from the makers of Match! the UK's best football magazine! Match! Joke Book is a hilarious mix of football quips, puns, knock-knock jokes and shaggy-dog stories. You'll laugh your football socks off! The Sweetest Stars Sergio Agu-AERO (Manchester City) Lee KIT-KAT-termole (Sunderland) MARS Bender (Bayer Leverkusen) ROLO Touré (Liverpool) John TERRY'S CHOCOLATE ORANGE (Chelsea)

Match! England Football Heroes

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Author: MATCH

Publisher: Pan Macmillan

ISBN: 1529014468

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: N.A

View: 9534

Who's your favourite England footballer? To help you decide, Match! England Football Heroes tells you everything you need to know about past, present and future superstars! Perfect for young football fans (or anyone with three lions on their shirt), this awesome edition of Match! is packed with all the info about forty-five of the best England players ever – player profiles, facts and stats, quizzes, greatest moments and the 2018 squad's FIFA World Cup journey. This must-have book features ten England legends, the current squad and players to watch from the youth teams. Discover more about Gareth Southgate, Harry Kane, Jordan Pickford, Raheem Sterling, Jamie Vardy, Kieran Trippier, Marcus Rashford, Dele Alli, Bobby, Moore, Wayne Rooney, Gary Lineker, Michael Owen, Bobby Charlton, David Beckham, Paul Gascoigne, Ryan Sessegnon, Jadon Sancho, Mason Mount and many more.

Match! Incredible Stats and Facts

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Author: Macmillan Children's Books

Publisher: Pan Macmillan

ISBN: 1509830049

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: N.A

View: 7660

Over a thousand jaw-dropping stats and crazy facts from the makers of the UK's best football magazine! Match! Incredible Stats and Facts is packed full of brilliant facts, stats, lists and records from fastest goals to top scorers and most red cards to tallest stars in the Premier League. Includes amazing player facts, bonkers football injuries, biggest transfer fees, fantastic footie legends, trophy trivia, stunning stadiums, incredible strange-but-true revelations, all the firsts, and the fastest, tallest, boldest facts about the Champions League, the Premier League, the FA Cup, the UEFA European Championship and the World Cup. *Former Tottenham Hotspur captain Ledley King holds the record for the quickest Premier League goal. He scored ten seconds after kick-off in a match against Bradford in the 2000/01 season. *Brazilian legend, Pelé, scored ninety-two hat-tricks, four goals on thirty-one occasions, five goals six times, and once bagged eight goals in a game! *Sergio Batista (1986) and Gennaro Gattuso (2006) are apparently the only two players to have won the World Cup while sporting a full beard.

The Essex Joke Book

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Author: Nicholas Knights

Publisher: Random House

ISBN: 1448132630

Category: Humor

Page: 192

View: 2454

WARNING: This book contains laugh-out-loud jokes about fake tans, vajazzles and all fings Essex Forget the Rolex or the flash car, what you really need in your life to make your friends well jel is The Essex Joke Book. It’s packed full of bling-tastic banter, racy rib-ticklers and gob-smackingly good gags all about Essex Girls and Boys, their tans and tribulations, conquests and cock-ups, and more. How can you tell an Essex Girl has been using her iPad? There’s Tipp-Ex on the screen. What do you call the skeleton of an Essex Boy in a wardrobe? Last year’s hide-and-seek champion. What goes blonde, brunette, blonde, brunette? An Essex Girl doing naked cartwheels. An Essex Girl gets a job as a teacher. She notices a boy in the field standing alone, while all the other kids are running around having fun. She takes pity on him and decides to speak to him. ‘You can go and play with the other kids, you know,’ she says. ‘It’s best I stay here,’ he says. ‘Why?’ asks the Essex Girl. The boy says: ‘Because I’m the f**king goalkeeper.’

Match! Football Puzzles

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Author: MATCH

Publisher: Macmillan Children's Books

ISBN: 9781509880089

Category:

Page: 208

View: 1124

The only soccer puzzle book you will ever need, from the makers of Match! the UK's best football magazine.Packed with brilliant footy puzzles, including spot the difference, wordsearches, crosswords, hidden-ball puzzles, wordfits, player quizzes, anagrams, odd one out and loads more!

The Irish Joke Book

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Author: Brendon Kelly

Publisher: Xlibris Corporation

ISBN: 1477159118

Category: Humor

Page: 88

View: 8402

The Irish Joke Book is a comprehensive set of jokes about the Irish. Brendon Kelly pokes fun at the Irish from the troubled times of the 1980s through to the Irish of today, still in global recession like the rest of us. The Irish can laugh at themselves and wont mind these, or should I say dese, jokes. Just take a few at a time. Youll laugh, groan and snicker at these sometimes harsh, sometimes crazy but always amusing Irish jokes. No-one is safe - not pilots on the Irish national airline Aer Lingus, not Guinness drinkers, nor Irish council workers. Sure theyre not safe. The Irish love a laugh, and have that inbuilt Celt good sense-of-humor, or as we text GSOH. And then theres the lurvely accent, on de ladies. And theyre good looking and the men - arent - Youll have your favorites. Then youll forget where the hell it was - dat joke. So I wrote dis handy Index at da back. Ya can test yourself by finding de words in de Index dat you remember all dere, to find de joke again. Or try and remember da joke from the line in de Index. Tanks a million ... P.S. Da sketches are of Molly Malone in Grafton Street, Dublin and the Irish milk given when ya donate a pint of blood. God bless the Irish! Brendon Kelly

Extreme Monsters Joke Book

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Author: Nikki Bataille Lange,Randy Meredith,Eric Smith

Publisher: Brighter Minds Children's Publishin

ISBN: 9781577911814

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: 95

View: 2571

Presents a collection of jokes and riddles about monsters, ghouls, ghosts, and other scary beings.

Jotd the World's Greatest Computer Joke Book

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Author: Hershel Remer

Publisher: Rabbs

ISBN: 9780615124490

Category: Computers

Page: 108

View: 5195

The greatest computer joke book ever! Written by a professional comedian/computer network administrator/rabbi, JOTD boldly makes fun of the world of computer technology, corporate America, and everything else. With a slant towards UNIX and Solaris, it gives great detail to operating systems to satisfy the most astute nerds, but offers enough broad range to reach anyone in the office world. JOTD is outrageously funny where humor doesn't even seem possible to show itself - deep inside the world of Geekdom. And, JOTD isn't just a compilation of wimpy one-liners, but is a collection of full-length caustic satires, zany scripts, and mature material. And, best of all, JOTD is low in fat and cholesterol.

The Unofficial Harry Potter Joke Book: Raucous Jokes and Riddikulus Riddles for Ravenclaw

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Author: Brian Boone

Publisher: Sky Pony

ISBN: 9781510740945

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: 176

View: 7195

Tickle Charms and Laughing Potions, meet your match! This follow-up to The Unofficial Harry Potter Joke Book: Great Guffaws for Gryffindor Here's just a sampling of the jokes you'll find inside: Which Hogwarts professor gets blamed for everything? Professor Snape Goat. What's Professor Lupin's favorite day of the week? Moonday. Why did Gilderoy Lockhart team up with Nearly Headless Nick? He needed a ghostwriter. Did you hear that Professor McGonagall's animagi and Crookshanks get together and gossip about students? They're very catty. Featuring pages and pages of jokes and more than fifty fantastic illustrations for Hogwarts lovers, this joke book provides endless fun. Have all your friends spellbound by hours of laughter!

The Unofficial Harry Potter Joke Book: Howling Hilarity for Hufflepuff

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Author: Brian Boone

Publisher: Sky Pony

ISBN: 9781510740938

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: 176

View: 538

Tickle Charms and Laughing Potions, meet your match! This follow-up to The Unofficial Harry Potter Joke Book: Great Guffaws for Gryffindor Here's just a sampling of the jokes you'll find inside: Which Hogwarts professor gets blamed for everything? Professor Snape Goat. What's Professor Lupin's favorite day of the week? Moonday. Why did Gilderoy Lockhart team up with Nearly Headless Nick? He needed a ghostwriter. Did you hear that Professor McGonagall's animagi and Crookshanks get together and gossip about students? They're very catty. Featuring pages and pages of jokes and more than fifty fantastic illustrations for Hogwarts lovers, this joke book provides endless fun. Have all your friends spellbound by hours of laughter!

The New York City Bartender's Joke Book

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Author: Jimmy Pritchard

Publisher: Hachette UK

ISBN: 0446551058

Category: Humor

Page: 300

View: 7296

Jimmy Pritchard has been collecting jokes from diverse individuals during his career tending bars in New York. This collection includes more than 400 jokes that are sure to have anybody laughing.

The Unofficial Harry Potter Joke Book: Stupefying Shenanigans for Slytherin

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Author: Brian Boone

Publisher: Skyhorse Publishing Inc.

ISBN: 1510737685

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: 176

View: 1645

Tickle Charms and Laughing Potions, meet your match! This follow-up to The Unofficial Harry Potter Joke Book: Great Guffaws for Gryffindor Here’s just a sampling of the jokes you’ll find inside: Which Hogwarts professor gets blamed for everything? Professor Snape Goat. What’s Professor Lupin’s favorite day of the week? Moonday. Why did Gilderoy Lockhart team up with Nearly Headless Nick? He needed a ghostwriter. Did you hear that Professor McGonagall’s animagi and Crookshanks get together and gossip about students? They’re very catty. Featuring pages and pages of jokes and more than fifty fantastic illustrations for Hogwarts lovers, this joke book provides endless fun. Have all your friends spellbound by hours of laughter!

Gregs Tagebuch - Von Idioten umzingelt!

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Author: Jeff Kinney

Publisher: BASTEI LÜBBE

ISBN: 3732508684

Category: Juvenile Fiction

Page: 224

View: 7109

Bei dieser Ausgabe handelt es sich um ein PDF. Bitte informieren Sie sich vor dem Kauf darüber, ob Ihr Gerät diese Datei öffnen und korrekt darstellen kann. Greg hat von seiner Mutter ein Tagebuch geschenkt bekommen. Und das, obwohl Tagebücher doch eigentlich nur was für Mädchen sind! Oder etwa doch nicht? Greg jedenfalls beginnt einfach mal darin zu schreiben und zu zeichnen: über seine lästigen Brüder, seine Eltern, seinen trotteligen Freund Rupert, den täglichen Überlebenskampf in der Schule, ein echt gruseliges Geisterhaus und über den verbotenen Stinkekäse ...

Mut zur Freiheit

Meine Flucht aus Nordkorea

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Author: Yeonmi Park

Publisher: Goldmann Verlag

ISBN: 3641178797

Category: Biography & Autobiography

Page: 320

View: 6961

Yeonmi Park träumte nicht von der Freiheit, als sie im Alter von erst 13 Jahren aus Nordkorea floh. Sie wusste nicht einmal, was Freiheit ist. Alles, was sie wusste war, dass sie um ihr Leben lief, dass sie und ihre Familie sterben würde, wenn sie bliebe - vor Hunger, an einer Krankheit oder gar durch Exekution. In ihrem Buch erzählt Yeonmi Park von ihrem Kampf ums Überleben in einem der dunkelsten und repressivsten Regime unserer Zeit; sie erzählt von ihrer grauenhaften Odyssee durch die chinesische Unterwelt, bevölkert von Schmugglern und Menschenhändlern, bis nach Südkorea; und sie erzählt von ihrem erstaunlichen Weg zur führenden Menschenrechts-Aktivistin mit noch nicht einmal 21 Jahren.

Super Cool Jokes and Games for Kids

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Author: Bob Phillips

Publisher: Harvest House Publishers

ISBN: 9780736907545

Category: Juvenile Nonfiction

Page: 160

View: 4273

Includes "humorous Bible riddles."

Heiße Milch

Roman

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Author: Deborah Levy

Publisher: Kiepenheuer & Witsch

ISBN: 3462317245

Category: Fiction

Page: 288

View: 8523

Shortlist des Man Booker Prize – die psychologisch faszinierende Geschichte einer Mutter-Tochter-Beziehung.Eine junge Frau begleitet ihre Mutter nach Spanien, wo diese in einer Spezialklinik behandelt werden soll, da die Beine ihr den Dienst versagen. Doch ist das Leiden der Mutter wirklich physischer Natur, oder versucht sie, ihre Tochter an sich zu binden? Dr. Gomez gilt als Koryphäe, deshalb reisen die beiden Engländerinnen nach Andalusien, wo sich Rose in Behandlung begibt. Sofia, deren griechischer Vater die Familie vor Jahren verließ, versucht zu ergründen, woran ihre Mutter erkrankt ist und wo sie selbst steht. Beim Schwimmen im Meer, das voller Medusen ist, in Gesprächen mit Dr. Gomez oder dessen Tochter wird ihr immer klarer, dass sie sich von ihrer Mutter befreien muss. Als sie die Deutsche Ingrid kennenlernt, die selbstbewusst und unkonventionell ihr Leben lebt, trifft Sofia Entscheidungen. Ein Roman über eine allzu enge Mutter-Tochter-Beziehung, über Abhängigkeit und Emanzipation und über die Suche nach Identität, ein Buch, das wie ein Quallenbiss brennt und noch lange nachwirkt. Deborah Levy, die Autorin von »Heim schwimmen«, wurde für diesen Roman mehrfach ausgezeichnet und für den Man Booker Prize nominiert. »Ein Roman, der in seiner Klarheit an Virginia Woolf erinnert« The Guardian